My last post was about how I was drafting a letter to send to Tyburn Convent. That letter is now written, signed and sealed and waiting for a stamp. I’ve lost my purse, hence the lack of stamps. But once I find it the letter will be stamped and send of. I’m excited but at the same time a little bit terrified. It’s like this is the first big step I’ve made. It’s one thing praying and thinking and writing about it, it’s another thing entirely to contact a community and say “I think I’d like to join you one day”. On some level it feels very invasive, me as this complete outsider trying to gain access to something so intimate. It does feel very strange writing to these complete strangers and wanting to be a part of their community. But I’ve found my purse so I can buy the stamps now!
I’ve got the joy in my vocation back. I think it’s because I’m hoping to find a community that I like and that wants me and then I want my mother to visit it. I’d like her to be able to see the place I want to join and ideally even speak with one of the sisters. Obviously they can give a better explanation of their life and I am sure they’ll have had sisters who had doubting parents before. I’m going to write to St. Cecilia’s now as well, but that will have to wait until tomorrow.
I can’t believe I’ve got a letter written and I’ll send it hopefully tomorrow!