A while ago I posted in my other blog a vocation story that came from St. Cecilia’s. To quote the story:
“Why are you doing this?” asked a teaching colleague, as we sat at an outdoor cafe. “Because I love God.” “You love God that much?”
I love God that much. So much that I want nothing more than to dedicate myself to Him entirely. I love Him more than I could ever have imagined was possible. I love Him above every other single thing on this earth. With every breath I take and every beat of my heart I love Him more and more. He is everything to me. I love Him so much I want everything to do to be for His glory and His service.
Lately I have been thinking a lot about the realities of religious life. Not in the sense that I have no done so before, but in the sense that I have been wondering about whether I will ever actually enter religious life. I truly believe I have a vocation to be a nun. I truly want to fulfil that vocation. The question in my mind has been whether I actually can fulfil that vocation. Not in the sense that I have an impediment as such, but in the sense that can I actually do all those little things that are required for one to fulfil a religious vocation. Sometimes I wonder if I can give up those little things, my books and my stuffed animals and being able to spend the day experimenting with baking different cakes. There are times when I doubt if I can do it.
This is where that love I just wrote about comes back in. I love God that much. When it comes to the crunch, I love God too much to ever say no to Him.